Here's To The End – Kelley Farrell

Today ends what I’ve perceived as my roughly 2 day pity party.

Life is hard sometimes, everyone has shit they go through, things they have to battle. If you’re truly lucky you don’t have to walk those paths alone, you get to walk them with people you care about, who care about you, and will stick there with you through it.

Can we really judge people for jumping ship though? Sometimes what other’s are going through is just too much. Or maybe it’s far too heavy to bear in addition to the load you already carry.

We want to believe that people should be there for us no matter what. We want to believe that they should wait for us.

Truthfully that’s too high of an expectation. Not everyone understands and not everyone has the want to understand.

That’s ok.

At the end of the day we can’t control other’s, only ourselves and our reactions.

I can’t will someone to accept the long period it took me to come out of the dark. I couldn’t push someone to put their life on hold so I could push them away while I drowned.

I can’t fault someone who chooses to see that situation for what it is and steps back.

Life is funny.

It gives you what you wish for in the most surprising ways and at the most awkward times but it ensures that you learn and grow.

At the end of the day our memories are all we have and our perception will always be our reality. We can’t change that for other people, only ourselves, and we have to make peace with the decisions we made in the heat of the moment. Maybe you regret them but you can’t change them, you can only learn from those moments and change going forward.

And that’s ok too.

So here’s to the end of the year and the beginning of another.