Today my heart is crying
For something once received
And every second
Which passes at the tick
The distance between us
Swallowing our voices
Grinding our memories
To powdered dreams
We live, we learn, we grow.
It’s amazing the evolution when color photos just taken drain and redden
And clouds just forming begin storming.
Haze permanently obscures the laughing moon
Blocking our memories of cloudless bug lit nights.
Shadows shift in undertones, subtly coloring the world in deepening blues.
I reached after you but you were too far gone.
Strides across the parking lot now shortened
And dagger edged words now blunted.
I stand on the shore of what could have been
Straining to pick the memories from those which tendrils of mist stole away.
We live, we learn, we grow.
We realize we’re wrong
But names appear on stones and fresh dirt churns easy,
When time has no regard for little human lives.
C’est la vie they sing in chorus lines across old TV shows.
C’est la vie you breathe as you turn away.
We can’t spend our lives waiting, with a shrug you go.
C’est la vie they sing as our lives pass us by, black and white picture shows.
We’re not frantic, just romantic, but even great loves rarely make it to the end.
C’est la vie they say, we told you so.
Stream of Consciousness Writing Attempt – Wordpress Daily Prompt – Candid
Music: Alberto Giurioli – once again I’ve found myself just shuffling on Spotify, no specific songs or albums
I have photos in my mind, candid pictures, frozen in time.
Of you, me, the world as it wishes it could be … the way it is and the way it could.
Like rough charcoal sketches, outlining your jaw
Tracing your lips and infecting everything we’ve become.
Conversations are easy, expressions in stars and beauty …
Total comfort we take for granted.
And yet here we are, with candid pictures but nothing solid.
Smudged charcoal memories
Scenes were there, we know, but we’re always just missing the point.
Always just grasping the cusp of the greater things
Only to find ….
We were never meant for the better side
So we cling to something more, hoping, praying, waiting …
We hide beneath silence and sideways glances
While we dangle from the precipice
Fuzzy charcoal portraits and blurry night walking pictures
With broken smiles and tear stained eyes
Are all we left behind but not all that’s left to find?
How long can you hold on? Hold out?
Close your eyes
10 minutes up.
I wrote you a poem, but I know you’ll never read it,
Every word seems breathy and full of some self serving purpose
I really just want to tell you …
But it’s hard when I know it’s been so long.
The cracks have been buried deep yet sometimes still they quake,
Shaking violently only to remind me that they still exist,
Sending the words we said ricocheting around these dusty memories.
I want to believe these brief launches into the past
Are more than just old heart ache taking hold
But I know I’m just selling myself a daydream.
I know I’m reading too much into that look in your eyes.
I know you never think of me.
Shameless self promotion incoming – go check out The Perfectly Imperfect Bunch
There’s a new wonderful post up by Bisma, My Words, My Savior
I hid it all at the bottom of a bottle,
Under a shiny round of all my favorite drugs.
I pushed back so far that I completely forgot,
I ever loved your smile.
I buried it by the beach we never got to visit,
Where I forgot I was supposed to hold your hand.
I sat and cried but I never knew what for
While I drew little question marks in the sand
I burned our future before I knew what it was,
And told myself to forget your name.
I took all the pills and drowned them with the cheapest vodka,
Till I laid on the floor and wondered why I was so scared.
And when I woke, covered in cold sweat and fever
I couldn’t remember how I got there
Or what all those tears were for.
Only that something had to change.
I hid it so well
I forgot I knew you at all.
It took me by surprise when you looked into my eyes.
I didn’t expect the whole world to disappear.
But I’m scared and lonely
And much to low for you to love.
So I scamper away to hide
In the sweet syrup at the bottom of the biggest bottle.
Every inch of my soul screams,
One day I hope you can see,
I believe I can pull myself up,
And maybe you can still love me.